Pronounced charcuterie. It is the word that describes cured meats. The internet tells me the word originated from France and I believe it.

Question: Why is a few pieces of thiny sliced meat so freaking expensive?

Answer: There's really nothing quiet like it. Good dry cured meats can take up to years to make. Good charcuterie starts from a good pig on a good diet. Basically, everything must be good, so the price is high a.f.

However! Just because I can't afford a $158 shirt from Nordstrom, doesn't mean I can't enjoy the finer things in life. Sure these meats can cost over $50/lb but no one said you should eat a lb of these things. It's more about the culinary experience and the flavor adventure than about the basic physiological needs on Maslow's hierarchy.

Which is why I am writing this blog post. Why the fuck are there so many different types of charcuterie meats? What do they all mean? How are they different? Why have I not seen any indepth deep dive into this topic on the internet?

Just because you're broke doesn't meant you can't be classy. You just have to make sure you're getting the most out of your dolla dolla bills by knowing what you're doing. I know of the charcuterie language but I don't know of the meaning of anything, both charcuterie and non-charcuterie related.

Wow. Look at that thin-goodness in terrible lighting and horrible camera quality. 

I've decided to make it my mission to understand the world of charcuterie and share it. I will break it down by region and release the articles over time. Here's the plan:

Part 1: Salumi - Italian cured meats

Part 2: Charcuterie - French cured meats

Part 3: Charcutería - Spanish cured meats

Part 4: The Charcuterie Board

Stay tuned homies.